January 2008
78 posts
December 2007
42 posts
“What I think would be nice for Christmas is……..All the DHL crybabies...”
– from ‘Danny’ on what are quickly becoming the funniest thing on the internet for me
“meatballies are cooking now just for you…lalalalala”
– my mom
Vinnie and I watch "The Wire, Season 4"
Me: Vinnie, when you run for office like Carcetti, you have my vote.
Vinnie: You have my vote, Papa.
Me: No, you have my vote, Vinnie.
Vinnie: No you have my vote.
Me: You have my vote.
Vinnie: You have my orange.
toilet
amber: pat, do you know the toilet won't flush?
me: vinnie, did you break the toilet?
vinnie: yes.
vinnie: first I poo'd, then I broke the toilet.
me: oh, there you go.
I Am Clearly A Really Bad Father
Me: (driving)
Me: That bumpersticker is stupid! I mean, look at it...
Amber: Oh, I didn't see it. What did it say.
Me: I don't know, it was so fucking stupid.
Vinnie: STUPID FUCKING PAPA STOP TALKING TO MAMA.
Me: (laughing non-stop)
Amber: Stop laughing!
Me: Vinnie, did you say "funky donut?"
Vinnie: No, I did not say funky donut papa, i said fuck.
“Get up, Papa. It’s time to have fun.”
– Vinnie Joe
Perhaps The Final Word On Plumbing From My Dad
Dad: Plumbing is difficult, new castaldo rule call a plumber, everything else fix yourself
Me: I'm not sure you still have rule-making authority.
Me: I'll consult the Joeism manual.
Dad: The manual can be rewritten anytime by the author!
Me: god didn't write the bible.
Me: it was the disciples.
Me: Or King James or whatever.
Me: Clearly you need to find a new moses or something.
More About Plumbers And My Father.
From: Joe.Castaldo Subject: RE: stupid pipe fittings. Date: December 12, 2007 2:53:26 PM PST To: Pat Castaldo Your father is much older now and can not do all the things he used to do and plumbing is 1 of those things, this is a buy olympia expense! ——-Original Message——- From: Pat Castaldo Sent: Wednesday, December 12, 2007 5:49 PM To: Castaldo, Joe...
Everybody Hates Plumbing But Me
I hate plumbing, call a plumber, I don’t have the patience to fix those things anymore, good luck. Don’t know what it is called. ——-Original Message——- From: Pat Castaldo Sent: Wednesday, December 12, 2007 4:49 PM To: joe.castaldo Subject: stupid pipe fittings. so, this is what’s on the end of my pipe at home: ...
“I am rethinking this whole Lutheran Pre-School thing.”
– me
Jesus Doesn't Work At The Office
Vinnie: I'm staying with you at the office.
Papa: Who else is staying at the office with us?
Vinnie: Bennet and Aaron.
Papa: Anyone else?
Vinnie: Tammy and Chloe... and Baby Jesus.
Papa: I don't think baby jesus works here.
Vinnie: No, baby jesus is at my school.
Vinnie: Baby jesus is at my school, papa.
Too late.
Em: should I get a tumblr
Em: ?
Me: do you have stuff to say
Em: not really
Em: but nobody else does
Em: either
Me: i do
Em: oh
Em: right
Me: now i'm gonna go eat
Me: create a tumblr
Me: tell me what it is
Em: did I tell you my wrong number story?
Me: no
Em: maybe that's one for a blog.
Em: a woman called and asked for someone I'd never heard of
Em: I said, "You have the wrong number."
Em: and she was all, "No. No, I don't believe I do."
Em: I told her it didn't matter what she believed
Em: she had the wrong number
Me: did you start a tumblr yet?
Em: no
Em: I don't think I should do it at work
Em: which would defeat the purpose of having on
Em: one
Em: I'll just tell you funny stories instead
Me: i could post them as you
Em: nah
Sharing is Caring
Amber: Can I have one of your carrots, please?
Vinnie: Ah, of course, here you go.
I'm tired.
okay… i’m back in washington state, in olympia, specificially, my basement, actually… and now i’m going upstairs. i went to the show in new jersey and it was a lot of fun. time in nyc: 28 hours. time on planes: 11.5 hours. time sleeping on tae’s couch: 6.5 hours. time in cab going to jfk: 1.5 hours. time typing this: 2 minutes. goodnight.
me: vinnie, what do you want to be when you grow up, a superhero?
vinnie: no, a fish.
NYC Bound.
I land at 3pm and leave at 7:30pm the next day. While I’m there, I’ll eat, see one of my favorite bands ever, hang out with one of my favorite friends, and sleep very little. I’ll back back shipping orders and whatnot on Thursday.
Rastafari
Me: (Getting my son dressed, trying to make him stand up)
Me: Get up, stand up! Get up for your rights! Get up, stand up.
Son: (starts dancing)
Son: Get up! Get up! Stand up!
Me: You like the Reggae, Vinnie?
Son: I do like the Reggae, Papa.